An Uncommon Apology

An Uncommon Apology 

I took a break from roaming the earth. For once, I wasn’t seeking to devour anyone. I mean I had been doing it for thousands of years and no matter how much I won, He still got praised. He still got praised…I was tired of the blood and poisoned wine the mermaids continuously served me. I was tired of the incompetence of my chief demons. I was tired of constantly having to prey the mind of the innocent children. I was tired of hiding behind the TV screen and having to watch teenagers wither away in sexual practices instead of facing their studies and building their lives. More so, I was tired of constantly having to battle the angels who, at some point in history, were my good friends. After having roamed the earth, I would still meet him and our usual question will be asked. It’s like the “hot or not” iPhone application. Some are hot, some are not. Some you believe are hot, but they actually turn out to be catfishes. In this case it’s more of a “will he fall or not?”. I say yes, He says no. Eventually, I manipulate him and if he isn’t strong enough, he falls… And 99.9% out of the time man never bounces back when I hit him. All of this didn’t matter for a second. I saddled my black unicorn and left the earth, leaving my commands with my princes.

The moment I left the earthly atmosphere, I looked back and saw how my servants followed humans. Pulling their hair, raping them spiritually (if its assignment was to be a spirit wife/husband), whispering into their ears ( and these morons called human beings believed it was God talking to them), closing their ears to the Gospel of truth… Not bad, not bad. I continued my journey and as I went on, I saw my servants hating and discriminating each other. Whenever they saw me, they left their various fights and kneeled before me. And then came my pride again, It grew out of my forehead as two ivory horns, my tail grew and my feet became hoofs that knew no mercy. I kicked these hideous creatures…Gnomes, wizards and witches! They were all hideous. I continued my journey and for a while, there was a warm silence. This silence was warm and imposing, it was a force of its own. The further I went, the stronger the force became. Now that was the Holy Spirit… Calm, gentle… but yet so strong. The Holy Spirit doesn’t talk too much and certainly not when I provoked him. But one thing that leaves me amazed is the fact that human beings are capable of grieving him. A sin that has no forgiveness. How God created The Spirit is so perfect that it is annoying.

- Lucifer, what are you doing here today? 
- Call my name with a little bit more of respect please. It is Lord Lucifer.
- Hmmm
- Spirit, I didn’t come here for you. Let me in so I can have my usual talk with your God.
- We are one.
- Blah blah. Holy trinity. Spare me the crap. You know I do not rate you out of the 3 of you. You’re the least of my problems.
- Haha. Don’t you always have problems? 
- Let me in!
- Ever heard of the word “please?”. You certainly lack home training, Lucie. 
- Call me Lucie one more time…

I saw Michael approaching with his sword. I hate Michael. Archangel Michael. Mighty in stature, brilliant in war and twice my looks. You know what is annoying? The fact that my name has a negative vibe. Out of the 7 billion people in the world, only 10 go by the name Lucifer. And that is just because those idiots believe they are a reincarnation of me. But Michael? Everybody calls their son Micheal. Every damn body!

- Uncle, I greet you. 
- Micheal.
- Father, requested that Lucifer be brought before the gate. He would have his usual talk with him there. 
- What of the saints?
- They are praying as they have been commanded. 
- Good. I am already at the gate. Lucifer, you are free to go. 

Lucifer without the “lord” is like Jesus without the “Christ”. My heart boiled and my anger was ready to melt the heavens as fire melts gold. Did this ghost just call me Lucie? An ordinary… WOOSAH! I left my horse and walked to the gate of Heaven where two other angels were standing. The rivalry between me and Michael was heated but we both kept mute and continued walking.

- I could give you the world, Michael, if only you would…
- Shut up. 
- Listen to me, Michael, you’re still my brother. Don’t let this argument I have with dad come between our relationship
- Do I look like I don’t know you? You think these tricks will work for me? Hahaha. Shut Up. 

His “shut up” was so swift and silent….too smooth to be rude. I got to the gate and as I stood there, everything around me disappeared. I found myself in the cloud and his light shined right before. I looked up and saw his feet.  I was there and so was my Father… Or should I say my enemy?

- Lucifer, where are you coming from? 
- I have been up and running…I didn’t roam the earth today.
- What have you come to do here?
- I have come to ask for your forgiveness. I miss home, Father. I know I have wronged you in many ways. I know and I realize all I have done to you and my brother was and is a grave mistake.
- If I forgive you, what do you intend to do with your servants?
- Send them to the pit of hell. They deserve to be there.
- If I forgive you, what happens to the souls of my loved ones that you have sentenced to eternal damnation?
- Well… it’s their loss obviously.
- Hmmm. 
- Aren’t you merciful and just to forgive?
- Aren’t you aware that your thoughts are very loud? 
- What thoughts?
- Satan, you of all people know that the words of my mouth do not come back to me void. Your arrogance speaks loudly. I cannot be deceived. Let this be the last time, you will insult my intelligence. My children cry for your deeds and you do not care for their redemption. 
- But…
- Be Gone. 

I found myself back on earth and my plan had failed me for the 6 millionth time. I was angry and I am still angry. You all aren’t ready for me. I tried to apologize. There was nothing wrong with my apology. There was nothing wrong with me demanding for my credit when it was due. Oh you, humans. You, humans!

 If He thinks you’re crying, I will make you all weep for eternity.

- The Alpha Female. 


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