Finding Love In Dallas: The View
It's crazy how the fruits of your imagination can become a reality. As a writer, I've always taken inspiration from true life stories. Sometimes I do add my pepper and salt to the mix so as to serve you a very hot dish in the form of a tale by moonlight. I've written many books on how to overcome fear, being successful, how to start your own business... I've been honoured to interview anynomous characters who share their deepest secrets with me hoping I will tell the world their story. I write about everything... and anything but this particular experience is a different case. When I look to my right and see the man I'm lying next to, I realise that is the man that I've always imagined myself being with. Not to scare scare you, but he looks every inch like the man I imagined myself being married to. The crazy things we do together are very same things I've daydreamed of in times past. It's crazy... when I think of T sometimes lose my mind and wonder how we came to be.
Anytime I'm in Dallas, something magical happens. I remember being around T. I remember sitting in that car. I stared at all those buildings realizing that these were the product of someone's imagination. I wondered if my own imagination could one day become my reality. I was nervous, I was afraid. I was a witness to fairytales coming through. I was a witness to love not being a tale for my lonely soul. I was sharing love with the one person that mattered... him. I must admit I had my doubts but he always found a way to ease my screaming emotions. I could finally laugh without thinking about whether my joke was funny. It's okay to be yourself, Bunmi. It's finally okay to be yourself. He's laughing. He's smiling and you effortlessly did that, Bunmi. Clap for yourself. Enjoy it as much as you can because it's not going to last. He's holding your hand. He's kissing your hand. He's telling you how much you mean to him. He's not lying. You're being loved. He's not perfect but he's perfect for you. Enjoy the moment, you're not going to experience something this real... ever again.
He took me to my favorite place and told me had made reservation specially for me. He's the only one who knows my spot... my favorite spot. The view is worth every penny. I can gaze at the skyline for hours lost in my own thoughts... I remember the sky was blue that night. People were cheering. I could feel the warmth of the city.
I went back to bed and looked at him. I had to poke him. I needed to know if he was real. He didn't wake up. He told me doesn't snore. But he was snoring so I poked him again. He took a deep breath and turned to me. I looked at him... he was still sleeping so I poked him again. I sighed and lied next to him. I then realized that I actually did meet this man off the internet. A few days ago I was stranded at the airport and he came to save me. How does an able bodied man sleep like a baby?
"Have you stopped poking me?"
He sounded half asleep. I rolled my eyes.
"I Just wanted to know if you were real"
He opened his eyes as if he was shocked and then laughed. I felt uncomfortable and I told myself I should have just kept quiet. I became timid. There was some type of heat in the atmosphere and I knew it wasn't the weather. I looked away. I had been with him for the past week and he never made an attempt to make love to me or kiss me. He showed me a type of respect I had never seen or experienced from a man in my entire life. I was slightly nervous because I felt he was about to say something.
"No.... actually you poked me to know if what we have is real."
"Your eyes... they sell you out. You can't hide it"
I didn't know what to say.... I remained quiet. He took my hand and.. have you ever felt a man staring at you with so much admiration?
"It's crazy... because I..."
" I don't know....I "
"Don't think about it too much, bunbun."
"Bunmi...? Bun bun. My bunbun"
"You know I hate you, right?"
He laughed and pulled me closer to himself. He had no shirt on. I was in my robe but i could feel my body craving his touch. I pulled and looked away. The awkward silence wasn't so awkward after all. He sighed and got up. He was quiet. I was wondering was going through his mind. He turned the lights down low and stood by the window. I could only see his figure but my semi- blind self couldn't see his face.
"Can I kiss you?"
The taste of wine, soft tender lips...he took off my glasses. I used to be scared when I didn't have my glasses on. I couldn't see clearly. But I was engulfed in this heat of the moment. The tension... it was passionate.
"Can I feel you?"
What was I thinking? I wanted to wait a little longer. But the heat of the moment... he pulled my robe open and pulled me to himself. There I was standing with my back against the wall hoping no one would see us. I looked at him as he touched my hair ample breast... he seemed pleasantly surprised.
"Can I make love to you?"
My sound reasoning went off. I didn't utter a word. He looked me in the eyes and planted a kiss on my forehead. I felt him pulling away from me. I must admit at that moment... I held him back and kissed him.
"I want you...I crave you..."
At those words, he carried me and put me on the bed. He kissed and caressed me, spread my legs open... and there I was... sinking in the sound of my own moans. Every lick... every well calculated stroke... every "I love you" he uttered...
I remember waking up to a number of missed calls. I was hoping it wasn't Henry calling me out of my place of happiness. I grabbed my glasses and wasn't so shocked to see Henry's calls and messages. He's last text message stated: "you'll meet me when you get home". Little did he know, I wasn't planning on coming back to the house.
"Is everything okay? I hope I wasn't too forward"
"Are you kidding me? Give me a kiss. I can't remember the last time I felt this way with anyone..."
"In other words... almighty Bunmi... loves me?"
I sighed. I couldn't lie...
"Yes... Mr T. I love you. I've been crushing on you for the longest. It goes past the long FaceTime calls... it's more than the DMs. It's..."
"a fairy tale come through... huh? Haha"
"You know what? Forget I said anything."
" I love you too Bunmi. That was... "
T dropped me off at the seminar and went to work. Here I was encouraging young black women to chase their dreams and maintain their integrity while doing so. They all asked after Henry. I wish someone would turn down the lights and erase his name from my record.
They don't know who Henry truly is. He's a not a bad man but not the best one either. I needed an escape from being with him... T came along a changed my perspective on love. T was there for me every step Of the way even though he didn't realize it.
Being with T is more than just sex. I've invested my emotions in him. He's become a part and parcel of my reality, my growth, my success... my life. He's my happiness.
Please don't judge me till you hear my story. I'm not sorry for my relationship with T.... I'm not sorry for cheating on my husband Henry. He pushed me to it.
I'm not sorry for loving T either...he's my fairytale come through. You wouldn't understand anyway... Unless I tell you what happened.
To be continued...
⁃ The Alpha Female